Why do we hate our curls?
If you’re a regular reader here you’ll know that I’m a naturally curly gal. For years I battled the frizz with some decidedly dodgy ‘dos’ that saw me go from blonde urchin cut to burgundy goth through my younger years, moving on to hair extensions and straighteners in my 20s and 30s. I hate to think what all this has done to the quality of my hair!
Thankfully Zoe from Silhouette du Barry, hairdresser to the stars and a good friend keeps my tresses tamed and the fab Boucleme range from Michele Scott-Lynch (I reviewed the range here) is really improving the health of my hair at home. These days you’ll usually find me embracing my curls or if all else fails I’m a big fan of a fabulous hat!
I love hearing from fellow curly-gals so today I’m delighted to welcome Beth who has been blogging at Betty and the Bumps for about 18 months and has the most gorgeous hair that I’m truly envious of!
Beth told me that writing has really helped her to make sense of her new life and identity as a Mum, and hearing that people have identified with any of her posts is the greatest feeling in the world – I can second that! Beth says she is happiest when she’s out and about with baby Gwenn and husband Andrew, dreaming about clothes that she can’t afford and homes she will never live in.
I just know you’re going to love this guest post all about her experience of having curly hair. If you’re on Twitter do follow her at too. Enjoy!
Hello.
My name is Beth, and I have curly hair.
If you met me anytime between the age of 14 and 30, it’s entirely possible you would not be aware of this fact. I have spent almost half of my life trying to disguise it.
It’s not as if I dislike curly hair, just not on me. I don’t have “nice” curls. Not naturally, anyway. It needs a lot of help and it’s actually easier to straighten it.
You have to treat curls well. You have to pamper them. Once you go down the route of using heat to hide them you ultimately cause more and more damage until wearing your hair naturally isn’t an option. Mine was so wrecked from heat and chemical processing (I’ve been colouring my hair for the last 15 years too) that I had just given up on letting it do its own thing.
Maternity leave was my saviour. For the first time in years I didn’t have the opportunity to go for my 12 weekly trim and balayage sessions. Getting childcare to pop into town wasn’t easy and anyway, it’s such a faff when you’re breastfeeding, even partially, to be separated from your baby for any significant length of time.
It gave it a chance to grow. The length and weight dragged my curl down. Skipping washes meant less exposure to sulphates. Leaving it to dry naturally meant I wasn’t subjecting it to searing 210 degree heat every day.
By the time my leave was over, my hair was long enough to leave it to do its own thing. I still rely on hair oil or serum after washing – I can’t imagine what would happen if I skipped that step – but on a normal day when it’s just Gwenn and I, I can dispense with the hairdryer and the irons.
It’s been a bit of a learning curve though. Last year I wrote my own post about getting to grips with curly hair because, as I said before, I don’t think I have the type of curls that look good without a lot of help and I’m still finding out about new products and different methods. I’m slowly but surely working out how to “do” curly!
Having said all this I still prefer my hair straight in certain situations, especially for work. I feel more professional. And on those days when I go curly, I find it hard not to choose a few ringlets to tong, for better definition. It’s a hard habit to break!
I think, to some extent, I’ll always be a straight-haired girl trapped in a curly-haired girl’s body! I suppose we always want what we don’t have. But now, at the grand old age of 32, I feel just as comfortable when my hair is curly than when I’ve ironed the hell out of it!
I think Beth looks stunning with or without the help of her straightening irons! Are you a fellow curly gal? Do you love or loathe your hair? I’d love to read your comments as always.
Linking up with Fashion Friday at Mummys Got Style, All About You at Mama and More
I too am a curly wurly! And since mat leave also, I’ve embraced it a little more.
Both ladies above, your curls are gorgeous! Embrace it – some ladies spend a long time trying to achieve what we step out of the shower with!
I also love going through a spell of curly hair, only to see how much it has grown when I wear it straight. Love this post xxxxx
Thanks so much Katie! It’s funny isn’t it how we always want what we don’t have but you’re so right – it’s important to embrace what you have and love it! Thanks so much for visiting and commenting x
Thanks for linking up to #fashionfriday darling, I do love my curls, mostly when I’m abroad and the water is softer and the heat gives me perfect curls. Another reason to live somewhere hot! x
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My curly, wavy hair is currently cut very, very short. I waffle between liking it long (though a breeze can transform it into what I think of as “witch” hair) and cutting it all off to make life easier. My usual hair routine is to wash it before bed, fall asleep with wet hair, and wake up in the morning to an interesting “style” 😛
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Such a fascinating post and no more so as I had poker straight hair as a child which turned curly due to hormones aged 13, as with my Mum’s hair. I spent childhood wanting curls, sleeping in plaits and then of course as soon as I got them, straightening my locks again. Now I like experimenting so have big wavy blow dries, straight hair or big natural curls. Each style needs products as does most hair, but you’re right curls or thick, wavy hair needs tlc. I think deep down I prefer my hair a big and curly, it reflects my personality and I know my husband loves it like that. Fab post and you both look wonderful #sharethejoylinky
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I have crazy, curly hair. It’s not so much the curl I don’t like, it’s the hideous frizz. And it’s getting worse with age. Looking forward to exploring your ideas/products. 35 now and still haven’t figured out how to manage it. #ShareTheJoy
Curly hair is great – I mean, it is crazy, and unruly, and takes extra care – but it show off our fun personality right away. Don’t you know us curly girls are our own brand of awesome?
i have dead straight hair. And flat too. I always wanted curly hair until so many people with curly hair said how much they wanted straight hair. Then I was confused! Mine actually won’t really curl unless you kill it with heat and product. Then it lasts a couple of hours… I have made peace with my straight flat hair. Having a baby helped me too. Helped me care less what I look like to be honest! Too much else to worry about and be busy with these days.
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My step-daughter has very dark, curly hair like her mom and hates it. She is constantly straightening and destroying it. I’m going to have her read this.
Jeremy recently posted…Us against Them
Mine is straight mainly but underneath it has quite a wave to it (my dad has very curly hair) as my hair has got longer it has got more wavy so I have to straighten it #sharethejoy
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I think you both have gorgeous curls. I have slightly wavy, mostly straight hair which I’ve never really done anything with – especially now that I no longer have much time to play with it. I’m glad that the busyness that comes with motherhood has helped you to be happier with your natural locks though
Louise (Little Hearts, Big Love) recently posted…From the mouths of babes #18
My best friend has lovely curly hair but much prefers it straight. We used to spend hours in uni straightening it with pre-ghd era straighteners! Ah, good times! As a girl with naturally straight hair I absolutely adore curly hair! x
We’re a funny lot aren’t we? Those with curly hair spend all their efforts trying to straighten it and those with straight, to curl it! 😉
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You are so right Colette – we’re never satisfied! But I’m certainly learning to love my curls the older and hopefully wiser I get!
I’ve curls, they give you personality! You both have gorgeous hair. I’ve got both wavy & straight which is really annoying as I just end up with a bushy mess au natural. I think we always want what we don’t have. #sharethejoy
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Thanks darling and you’re so right – this way in all things eh? 😉
As a former owner of hair, I also know what it’s like when you can do nothing with it.
Now when I shave, I don’t stop around the ears, but continue up and over the top, removing any worry of how to wear my locks today 😉
Haha I’d say that I’d love to give this a try… but perhaps I’ll put up with the curls for a bit longer! 😉
i would describe my hair as wavy. Not super curly, but never straight. But some days it can be really curly too. I’ve actually really grown to love my curls, with the right layers I can dry it mostly naturally and just tough dry it to finish it off. The frizz is a pain & serum & I don’t mix it makes my greasy. So much do I hate it straight now & never use straighteners it always has kinks in by the end of the day anyway. If I’m going out I’ll tong it for a boost rather than straighten. X
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