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Posted by on Jan 4, 2014 in Uncategorized | 8 comments

On making New Year resolutions

Image courtesy of Chanpipat /

I‘m not usually one for making New Year resolutions. Loose weight, drink less wine, spend more active outdoor time with the children, write more… there are lots of things I would like to do better or more regularly but resolutions without a plan feel like empty words to me. As Mary Poppins says, they’re pie-crust promises – easily made, easily broken.

So when our four and a half year old, Curly Girl, heard the phrase on television this Christmas and wondered what it meant I was a bit hesitant about how to explain it to her. “A resolution is a promise that you make to yourself to be better at something in the coming year,” I said. Then to check that I’d explained it suitably I asked her what resolution she might make for herself. “To be better at eating my school dinners,” she replied instantly. Yep she got it. She got it perfectly.

Then a thought occurred to me and I asked her what resolutions she might like us to make. She decided that Daddy should be a nicer Daddy (when pressed this actually meant letting her eat chocolate biscuits whenever she felt like it, naturally), Little Man should stop biting (yes please) and for me?

“I’d like for you to be a happier Mummy,” she said.

Out of the mouth of babes.

This got me thinking about what would make me a happier Mummy. I spent some time last year working on happiness with the team but while I understand the principles behind the science of being grateful etc, what really ups my happiness quota is actually quite simple. It’s having some time to myself during the day.

Time to write, to blog, to run, to chat with like-minded virtual and not so virtual mates on social media, to read, to be creative, to share.

I seem to have lost this time recently, with Little Man crawling and now walking, with school runs and homework, Christmas and life in general I’ve got a bit lost in the mix.

And I’ve become resentful. Resentful that no-one is giving me the time that I crave. But that’s part of the problem. I need to stop relying on anyone else giving me that time. I’ve got to take it for myself.

And so this year I’m not going to make any pie-crust resolutions but I am going to make a plan. A plan to spend a little time by myself at least three times a week. Even it it’s only for an hour. Even if it means getting up at ridiculous-o’clock while the house is still asleep. It’s my New Year gift to myself.

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  • Mummy Plum

    I know exactly how you feel. I could have written this myself. I find the trouble is I feel selfish insisting on it – like yesterday when I practically forced Husband and two kids outside to the swings in the cold for an hour so I could have a little head space. I think you’re right, a plan really helps – makes it easier to ringfence the hours each week. Good luck with finding the time. Happy New Year x

  • Mrs TeePot

    That sounds like a really good plan, I hope it makes you feel much happier and gives you a great 2014

  • bod for tea

    I hear you – asking for it makes me feel guilty which is so wrong! So far I’ve managed one day – the baby keeps wanting to join me!

  • bod for tea

    Thanks honey, fingers crossed!

  • Franglaise Mummy

    Go you! As you say you’ve got to find that time for yourself, as it’s unlikely anyone will offer it up to you ;-) This is similar to my plan (not resolution) for this year – let’s see how we both get on…

  • bod for tea

    Glad to hear I’m not alone out here! I’ll be checking up on you… :)

  • HonestMum

    What a great plan-Happy New Year to one of my favourite bloggers-2014 is all about me restructing my schedule (already started), having lots more down time, filling my blog with more food, family and film and being a better mama, friend and wife!

  • bod for tea

    Happy New Year to you honey! Thank you for your kind words – I love your plan for 2014 too – I hope it includes Brit Mums so we can have another natter face to face! :)