How to Cut the Crap and Feel AMAZING
Last week I wrote about Become the Best You by Renee Davis who blogs at Mummy Tries, a fab book that drew a lot of comments from fellow readers! This week I want to share a book that was gifted to my by Ailsa Frank; the fabulously titled Cut the Crap and Feel AMAZING.
Don’t you just LOVE that title? Makes you want to dive right in and learn all the lessons it has to teach.
But I actually quite found it quite hard to read because it brought home a lot of truths that I needed, but I wasn’t sure I was ready for.
Cutting the crap and feeling AMAZING is all about rising above the negative and the dramas in your life. It’s about being more positive by breaking down bad thought patterns that have become habits. As Ailsa points out
The way you live your life is based on a series of habits and established patterns. By replacing old habits with new ones, you can change your life for the better.
Heck this book could have been written about me!
I realised that I DO have a tendency to make dramas out of the smallest everyday irritations. Late for school? Drama. Kids won’t sleep? Drama.
It’s not what’s happening but how you respond to it that is important.
My drama causes stress – but not just for me. It causes stress for those around me, for my children. In the Parenting chapter I learned that I’m modelling behaviour for them with my actions, words and emotions. If I shout, they will too. If I’m stressed, they will be as well. No wonder so many of the school mornings that start out with me rushing and stressing about being late end up in tears! It’s up to me to be the grown-up and model positive, calm behaviour. There are so many great lessons here from modelling and connecting to using your words carefully, building a relationship that will last a lifetime and making life fun. I’ve read and re-read the Parenting chapter because it resonates so much with me.
Throughout her book Ailsa talks about rising above the drama and negativity through some simple techniques – there’s more than one technique listed in the book so you can choose what works for you. To give you an example, I particularly like the idea of separating myself from my past by thinking of events in my life as stepping stones;
Everything we experience, whether good or bad, helps to build our character, gives us life experience, helps us to feel a full spectrum of emotions and gives us more understanding of what we don’t want so we can aspire to what we do want.
I LOVE this because it lets me see my past behaviour, my negativity before I started this journey, as part of learning how I DON’T want to live my life. See how that turns it into a positive?
Ailsa is a big proponent of visualisation and one of the key themes of the book is getting into the AMAZING zone using this technique, just as racing drivers and athletes do. I’ve actually been doing this for a long time in relation to my career and I call it ‘BE, DO, HAVE’ (essentially ‘be’ the person you want to be, ‘do’ the things they would do and you will achieve or ‘have’ that experience) but I’ve never applied it to my family life – DOH! Cue lightbulb moment!
So in the mornings now I’m using Ailsa’s visualisation technique to imagine the best day possible for that day. I tell myself it’s going to be AMAZING – with no dramas – and I’m really finding that it helps me be more positive. I’ve also added the word to my everyday vocabulary – you’ll see it a lot here! – because it’s so emotive and energising. I know it sounds simple (scoff if you want), but simple often works.
Through making this and other techniques described in the book the new habits (just like the healthy habits the husband and I worked on last year with NOOM to lose 60lb between us) Ailsa believes we can all make changes to cut the crap from each area of our lives – work, wealth, relationships, parenting, addictions, heartache, bereavement, stress and mundane, everyday irritations.
Here’s a quick takeaway – the top 3 actions I’m working on right now from Cut the Crap and Feel AMAZING:
- Cut the drama, model positive behaviour for my kids and make life FUN
- Visualise an AMAZING life
- SMILE and realise that everything in life is a phase – a stepping stone
Ailsa Frank is a qualified Registered Hypnotherapist, Member of the General Hypnotherapy Register, The Hypnotherapy Society and the National Guild of Hypnotists. She combines her techniques, extensive experience with clients and real-life stories to teach you how to help yourself. This book is about letting go of the negative and learning to manage your life better, living the a life that makes you smile and sorting through the things you need to change to make that happen. A big, fat, hairy YES to that from me!
I have to say a huge thank you to Ailsa for sending me a copy of her book and helping me to start my Journey to Joy this year.
Cut the Crap and Feel AMAZING by Ailsa Frank (£14.99 Hardback) is available from www.ailsafrank.com, by phone 01276 683123, or via www.amazon.co.uk and it’s also available as an e-book.
Stepping stones image: SINGMANO/Shutterstock.com